Sunday, 6 January 2019

Big new and little news

Big news first ...

The invaders are gone!! Not without some coaxing ... Ok, flat out throwing them out of our house on New Year's. It was such a nightmare. It will never be repeated. It was really just so awful for everyone. But it's over. My house is my own again. I knew it was bad, but didn't realize how bad until they were gone and I could breathe again. Happy days! 4 months ... 4 months of something that could have torn us apart at the seams but instead, all it did was pull the stitches tighter. So I guess something good did come out of it. Sadly, it's a lost relationship for Garf and it's been super hard on him. I would undo that if I could.

Little news ... (but it's almost as big to me as the big news is)

The day after the invaders left, I asked Garf, "When do I get my (MY) life back?"

"Now."

And yes, I have my life back. Still some things to work on and figure out what this means for us now. But we'll get there. This hidden little doesn't have to hide. And Garf is doing an excellent job taking care of me. He was a little lot uncomfortable with the idea of daddies ... but, once again, he's making the effort for me. It doesn't matter what label you wanna put on it ... it is what it is. He has the nature of a daddy and it's just become more obvious over the years. Especially this last year. I'm not full-blown little, definitely not typical, but if someone wanted to label it, I guess I'm more little than I ever would have thought. I find it interesting how things have changed and evolved. How I've changed, what I want is changing. And somehow we're just evolving into this new unit. Garf is totally catering to the little in me and it makes me all mushy inside. I kinda can't wait to see what's next and even that is new for me. I feel like I can't wait to see what or where tomorrow brings us.

Having an up close and far too personal view of someone else's relationship the last few months ... I gotta say, I am feeling much more appreciative of what Garf and I have. I admit I spent a lot of time, too much time, focusing on all that was wrong when there was just so much that was right. *sigh*  Hindsight right? lol


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