Friday, 12 January 2018


That man of mine makes my head hurt.
He said the other night that he was trying to be more adventurous, trying to be what I need. *sigh* If only he would learn to not leave me in the dark for weeks at a time. If only the adventurous occurrences could happen a little closer together and not just once or twice a month. I have to admit when he's feeling adventurous, it's fun for me :)

If only ...

I'm having a really hard time getting my head back in the game. He's not ... feeding me enough. It comes and goes, slowly, and I know it's gonna go, so I just can't get on board with anything. Maybe, maybe, maybe, it can get better when we have privacy again.

Tax season is coming, and I can't wait. If it's anything like previous years, it's the one time of year that things tend to go right for us. It's time to play catch up with bills that may be behind (though I'm hoping that we'll be all on top of things for the first time in almost 4 years within the next 2 weeks ... though maybe I shouldn't say that as the freezer compartment gave out in both fridges, and this is on top of the element in the oven dying just after Christmas) and maybe, just maybe, we'll be doing a little renovating and we'll have a nice, new, (soundproof) bedroom ... and maybe a new bed to go with it.

Maybe, just maybe, in a few months we'll be putting electric fence up, stalls built in the garage/soon to be barn, and I'll have my horses back and maybe this year we'll do ducks instead of chickens, and maybe even a couple of goats. Not sure on all that ... while it's not overly expensive to do, it might push the budget just a little too far this year. We'll see ... I've got my fingers crossed. Maybe if I actually did some damn work? I've barely touched work since the week before Christmas. Started playing WoW with everyone (hubby, kids, friends we don't get to see) and I let myself get sucked right in to that. I don't make much, but a couple hundred each week could go a long way towards getting shit together this year. I just can't seem to find my get up and go though. And Garf isn't pushing the issue. Because we have food, and heat, and a home, and bills are more or less under control. So he lets it all slide, or rather, lets me let it slide.

That's it for my words. I'm a little surprised I came up with that much.


  1. Well you sound hopeful????


    1. I really don't know how I feel. I *want* to be hopeful, I'm just not sure if I am. There always seem to be a wrench thrown in the works every time.

  2. Well, hopeful or not, Spring is up next so get yourself some baby ducks and enjoy life for a bit.

    1. Yep, it'll soon be time to make an order for some ducklings ... that'll be fun, we've not kept ducks yet. And if I can talk the kids into cleaning up after them, that'd be a bonus!